when lydia works night i usually take the opportunity to watch about 3 or 4 tv shows at once, flipping back and forth between channels. one of the shows that unfortunately caught my attention was a special that was taking place on dateline where they were trying to catch internet predators by having people pretend to be young teenagers inviting these predators over to their house while their parents are away. when the men would arrive in the house they would quickly be met by the host of dateline who would sit them down and talk with them. the reactions of the men were mainly denial, and some quickly responded with an apology and a promise to never do this type of thing again. then men would leave the house and breath a sigh of relief, thinking, "wow, that was a close one", only to be tackled by about 6 cops, have their picture taken, and be sent to jail. this whole show was disturbing, but i had a sense of peace that justice was being served and that i was seeing these men get caught red handed. but then, at the end of the show the most horrific thing happened. the last predator they profiled was a 40 year old man who believed he was coming to meet a 14 year old boy. the man got out of his car and walk around to the other side and took his 5 year old son out of the back seat and proceeded to walk to the house while holding his son's hand. when the man went inside, the dateline host immediately explained what was going on, so as to not frighten the young boy, and the man was swarmed by cops while the boy was whisked away by a female cop to keep him from seeing what was happening to his poor excuse of a dad. i couldn't help but weep for this boy. i felt sick to my stomach. i turned off the tv. i just stopped and thought, "what the hell is wrong with this world?". it made me so sick.
obviously this bothered me deeply for the next while and when i was trying to fall asleep i couldn't get this guy out of my mind. then the good Christian thought of "well, Jesus died for Him too." came into my mind. it made me so angry. i was furious that God's grace wouldn't stop short of this man... seriously, i'm even ok with God forgiving murderers, thieves, and liars... but i have a short list of people that i think should be taken straight to an eternity of suffering rather than a few years in jail. yes-- we're all sinner, and yes-- i can even say that i'm no better than the murderer or the adulterer. but i would like to think that i'm better than a pedophile. i would like to think that i'm not the same as a rapist in God's eyes.
how is it that something so beautiful as God's grace can seem so terrible within a different context?
if you care to check out the story of Dateline catching predators, you can do it here.
6 comments:
Odd enough, We are doing a series on Jonah this month, and that is the exact thing that bothers me the most about this book, I see way too mcuh of myself in Jonah because i get pissed when God's mercy is given when i don't see the need for it.
ahhh! i've always made fun of jonah for that and now i'm him. i think i'm just going to sit under a plant for shade and whine.
aaaaaaaaaaaahrgh. yeah, fatty, it pisses me off too.
have you listened to sufjan steven's song "john wayne gacey jr" off his Illinoise album? if you don't know who gacey is, google him. similar themes going on... and in the song he whispers "and in my best behavior i'm really just like him."
one reviewer said sufjan was full of shit and mellowdramatic and all... but with a pauline theology of sin being "missing the mark" (as translated from the gk)... we are all off. and while there are variant degrees of "offness"... we are all "off" enough to need christ. hard to swallow in the context of such sick violence.
(just reminded of g.k. chesterton's idea of "there are many angles at which one falls, but only one at which one stands")
I heard Philip Yancey speak while I was in South Africa, oddly enough. Someone who didn't approve of his book, "What's So Amazing About Grace?" called it, "What's so Annoying about Grace." I think that's just as appropriate, we struggle so much with Grace, until we realize how much we need it. :)
I also love that Sufjan Stevens song.
phil... thanks for the insight. this all was just really bothering me, but as you've said... we've all missed the mark, but some have missed it by a greater degree than others... i guess the troubling/disturbing/annoying thing of it all is that God's grace extends to even those who are way off the mark... but i guess that's the mystery of grace. we're all in the same boat, not being able to measure up by our own works, whether we're close or way beyond reach...
maria... thanks for stopping by our blog!! that's crazy you saw Philip Yancey while in Africa... "we struggle so much with Grace, until we realize how much we need it"... so true... probably because we really never understand grace until we truly need it, eh?
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